The realities of living with sarcoidosis are not complicated. It is difficult. It has changed my life. I grieve. It saddens me and if I failed to recognize this, I would only be living in a freaky made up world of whacked out denial. I am a realistic person and it serves me well. There are less surprises this way. Being realistic, accepting my limits and grieving the changes in my life that have come from living with a chronic disease, does not make me an unhappy person…far from it.
There is a place for positive thinking in this world. It is important to stay hopeful but when hope turns into denial, things take a strange turn and that’s not a place I ever want to go. I talk a lot about the difficulties of living with a chronic disease in my blog because that is what my blog is about. It is called “Sarcoidosissoldier” for a reason and that is because I am a warrior, in the fight of my life. I won’t pretend that it is easy and rosy when sometimes it is just down right brutal and terrifying but that doesn’t mean that I am unhappy…I am far from it.
I try to present this disease honestly and part of being honest is acknowledging the difficulties of daily life. It is hard to breath. My body hurts all the time. Fatigue lives inside of me like a body snatcher. All of these things and more are part of my reality but they are only part of my reality and because they do not entirely define me, I am not unhappy…I am far from it. So, do not mistake the times I speak frankly about my disease as a cry for help or a desire to be pitted because if you do, then you have entirely missed the point. Do not assume that just because I am truthful about my reality that I am unhappy because I am far from it…very far from it!