Whenever I meet a woman for the first time, I have to hold my breath and hope she’s not one of those women. You know, the type. They give you a phony smile, their voice goes up in a high pitch when they say that it’s nice to meet you, as they not so subtly check you out from head to toe.
I hate that look, the look you get from these women as they size you up, trying to determine what kind of competition you are going to be. I’ve gotten “the look” a lot in my lifetime. It’s a hurtful look. It’s meant to be a warning. There is cruel calculated coldness in the eyes of these women. They are the mean girls of the world.
It’s hard to understand this look, especially when you aren’t one who tends to give it. I am not threatened by other women and I don’t think of myself as being in competition with them. There is no hidden war to be fought with me, no quiet battle to be waged. But in my experience, there are women who want to take you to war if they can and any way they can.
Generally I just ignore these women because once I see “the look”, I know what kind of woman you are. You are likely not someone I want to be around. Things are hard enough for women. We should be sticking together. We should be encouraging each other. We should be lifting one another up instead of secretly wishing ill will upon women we think are smarter or prettier or more put together than we are.
It does no good to compare someone else’s outsides to your insides. You cannot possibly know the private trouble of another person. We all have quiet sorrows. We also all have unique stories and different strengths and special gifts to offer. We would be wise to search out these things in each other rather than focusing on the surface of what we first see in someone. Making snap judgements about another based on superficial things is a mistake.
“The look” is unpleasant. It’s a turn off. Giving “the look” won’t win you friends or influence people. Giving “the look” is a tell to what kind of person you are. In the long run, “the look” will leave you unhappy and alone because “the look” is nothing more than childish insecure pettiness.
Don’t give the look!
Sarcoidosis Soldier 
I guess I’m not considered competition because I’ve not really experienced that look, either that or I’m just oblivious to it (which could easily be the case–I’m not very in tune with what different looks mean). I wholeheartedly agree that people should not compare themselves to each other. I do know there are those who artificially lift themselves up by looking down at others, such a shame. I guess I just tend to ignore those kinds of people.
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I wish I didn’t notice the look…but I do…and it’s mean! You’re smart to ignore those people…once I get the look…I ignore those people too!
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I don’t think they care what people think knowing they do this.I wonder if they know?
My sister and her daughter do this when they are out.I dread going out with her.My grandmother raised her and she was the same way, “untouchable” I’ll say. It is as if she is on a pedestal.I smile at everyone I look at and say hello.Their is a grocery store not far from my home not many people smile and say hello back.I think they think their face will crack.I try not to shop here unless I need something fast because I feel a certain way for a while after I leave.It is hard not to let it bother you.My mom always said ignorance is bliss.
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I know just what you are talking about. That look from women who think they are superior to other women. Women who want to be unkind and fight with others. I have no use for that type of woman at all! We Women should stick together, we have enough trouble without these mean gals bothering us. Good post.
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Thanks!
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