(Preface: I typically don’t preface my blogs but this one is a bit out of character for my usual writing style and I wanted to explain. All of my life I have run into people who, for no obvious reason seem resentful toward me. Now, it’s not a lot of people but it is a pattern. Every time it happens I am taken aback and hurt by it. People who care about me throughout my life have always said the same thing about these people when this happens – that it has to do with jealousy. And I am always at a loss because I can never figure out why anyone would be jealous of me. I end up feeling hurt and sad and like their unhappiness is my fault. Well, it happened again recently but this time, I am taking a different approach…thus this blog post.)
It’s called the “green eyed” monster for a reason. Jealousy is ugly and it has a way of spreading misery like few other emotions.
But I don’t have to let that green goop wash its way on to me. I don’t have to let someone else’s contempt toward me for actually being happy ruin my joy.
Go ahead and reveal in your misery if you so chose. Go head and compare yourself to me. Go ahead and hate my peace. Go ahead and think me a phony. Go ahead and lust after my bliss.
You can try to steal my peace, my joy, my light. You can try to take away my happiness and pull me into your dark place but it won’t last. You won’t win because stealing my joy won’t make you happy. All it will do is feed your ugly green monster. And I won’t stay there with you anyway and you will be more alone than ever in your petty little world of self hatred.
Go ahead and tell me I’m wrong because I don’t agree with everything you say. Go ahead and judge me without really knowing the first thing about me. Go ahead and put your need to be right above all else. Go ahead and create your little army of haters and go ahead and hate me for being me.
No matter how much energy you put toward your envy, you will never be happy in that state. No matter how hard you try to make your anguish my problem it never will be. No matter how hard you work at bringing me down, it will always be you who falls.
If you’re unhappy that’s your problem…not mine.
If you want to stay stuck in the pain that we all experience in life, go ahead.
If you want to drown in your own self righteousness go ahead.
You can feel jealousy and hate for me.
I will feel pity for you.