I have kept an actual list of all the dumb things people have said to me since being diagnosed with sarcoidosis. I find it quite amusing, sometimes sad, and occasionally frustrating. These are comments from doctors, friends, neighbors, family members, strangers….just about everyone!
“Are you really that tired that you can’t even go the the movies tonight? I mean, all you have to do is sit there.”
“No one ever gets that tired.”
“How could you possibly like sitting so much?” – (One of my personal favorites….so dumb!)
“I read about your disease online. It doesn’t sound that bad. And it didn’t say you would be so tired. Are you sure you aren’t depressed or something?”
“Sarcoidosis doesn’t cause fatigue” – (This one came from a doctor…not a doctor who is treating me, but a friend of mine…boy did I set him straight!!!!)
“Can’t you just try to sleep better at night?”
Regarding Having Sarcoidosis:
“What’s that? I never heard of it….you’re weird.”
“Who gets a disease no one has ever heard of?”
“Sounds like one of those ‘House’ diseases.” – (Referring to the TV show)
“I read about it. You’ll go into remission and be back to normal in no time”.
“I read about your disease online. It doesn’t sound like anything too serious”.
“Wow, weird…too bad you don’t have cancer. You’d get more support” – (Who wishes cancer on someone….really….I almost fell down laughing when a now former co-worker said that one.)
Regarding Being Sick:
“You don’t look sick.” – (An oldie but goodie…I probably hear this one the most.)
“How can you possibly be so sick and look so good? I don’t get it…are you sure you’re really sick?”
“If you keep losing weight, you’ll be size zero. I’d kill to be size zero”.
“What’s up with that cough? Take some cold medicine or something.”
“Why do you get so cold? I don’t get it…it’s 75 degrees today.”
“I’ve never heard of using a chemo drug for anything but cancer. Are you sure your doctor knows what she is doing?”
“You are fine. Don’t play it up.”
“When are you going to go back to work? It looks like you should probably get back to work now…you look too good to be sick.”
“I never said you couldn’t work.” (This one from my doctor. She really pissed me off the day she said this. Very poor bedside manner.)
“If you’re so sick, why do you always have rosy checks?”
I could go on and on but I won’t. You get the idea. I’ve learned a few things about people since getting Sarcoidosis. The first is that most people just don’t care. People are generally pretty self involved and these people tend to speak before thinking. Why should I waste any more energy on their ridiculous comments than they do on caring that I’m sick? And the second is that those who do care simply don’t always know what to say. They are well meaning, so there is no point in getting mad at them.
It is important for me to keep a good sense of humor about what people say or else my feelings would be hurt…a lot. But I have to admit that some of the things people say still amaze me! There is a lesson in this for all of us. Maybe some people just shouldn’t talk!